The Chrysalis and the Butterfly: A New Way to Think About the Relationship Between Spirituality and Religion

“I’m spiritual but not religious.” It’s an increasingly common way for people to identify their relationship to spirituality (as a system for personal growth) and religion (as an institution that requires membership, conformity, and submission). The younger you are, the more likely you will agree that this statement describes you.

It’s ubiquitous enough that it’s recognizable simply by its initials: “S.B.N.R.”

Other ways of describing this is “spiritually independent” and “the Nones” — a delicious pun that can describe anyone who, faced with a form that asks your religious identity, replies “None.”

Meanwhile, churches are facing a membership that is both aging and declining. Every year, it seems that fewer people are adhering to the traditional trappings of mainstream American religion: membership in a local church or synagogue, regular participation in weekly worship along with other activities organized around fellowship, education or service, and adherence to an ethical code that stresses personal morality and conformity to social norms.

S.B.N.R. people usually have thoughtful reasons why they say “no” to traditional religion.

Many people may reject religion precisely for spiritual reasons. They see religion as an obstacle to seeking truth (“If I’m a member of a particular church, I’m told I don’t need to be learning about…